Wednesday, September 19, 2012

In Which Lara Is Rather Quite Feminist

I have a little itty problem.

Sometimes people make me angry in their discussion of or treatment of girls.

I'm well aware that although the Church itself is about as far from misogynistic as you can get, some of the people in it can be just that.

Case in point:
Today I was walking home from class in front of a group of boys.  They were talking about a girl.  The conversation went something like this:
Boy 1: "...she's in the same major as my mom."
Boy 2: "What major is that?"
Boy 1: "Family and Consumer Science.  So, like a 'life' major."
Boy 2: "She's basically training herself to be a wife and mom!"
Boy 1: "Yeah.  And she can cook really well.  She'd be a great wife."
Boy 2: "That's awesome!" (proceeds to ask him about dating her, etc.)
When I stopped at the crosswalk I realized I was all but fuming with anger.

I am BY NO MEANS saying that there is ANYTHING wrong with majoring in Family and Consumer Science.  Kudos to that girl; I'm sure she's awesome.  My issue here lies with the boys.
In particular, the way the fact that she was majoring in FaCS made her immediately much more attractive to them.

Now, I'm sure these are good boys who want a wife and a family someday, and I fully support that.  But the tone of their conversation sent the message that this girl was superior to other girls on the dating scene because she was in a "wife-training" major, and that it would be a turn-OFF if a girl were in a less family-focused field of study such as, say, engineering or something.

Let me explain this to you.

I am an engineering major.  I LOVE doing all the stereotypically "boy" things like math, physics, chemistry, computer systems, good old-fashioned "numbers and equations and analysis" problem-solving.  I fully intend on getting married and having a family and placing my family as my first priority in life.  I don't care if I never get the chance to actually have a CAREER in my field, because I'm learning problem-solving approaches that will help me in whatever I do for the rest of my life.  I've already seen how my major is going to make me a better wife and mother, and I'm not all that far into it yet.

And yet a lot of the boys I meet--dare I say?--more than half of them, display either a visible or an audible negative reaction when I tell them what my major is.

That makes me sad.  Because of things like this quote, straight from the mouth of President Hinckley: "In this day and time, a girl needs an education. She needs the means and skills by which to earn a living should she find herself in a situation where it becomes necessary to do so.
"The whole gamut of human endeavor is now open to women.  There is not anything you cannot do if you will set your mind to it.  I am grateful that women today are afforded the same opportunity to study for science, for the professions, and for every other facet of human knowledge.  You are as entitled as are men to the Spirit of Christ, which enlightens every man and woman who comes into the world.
"You can include in your dreams of the woman you would like to be a picture of one qualified to serve society and make a significant contribution to the world of which she will be a part.  Set your priorities in terms of marriage and family, but also pursue educational programs which will lead to satisfying work in case you do not marry, or to a sense of security and fulfillment in the event you do marry.  Education will increase your appreciation and refine your talent." (x)

I think a lot of boys here don't realize that or don't really think about it.  Just because a girl isn't majoring in FaCS doesn't mean she doesn't want to be married and have a family just as much as a girl who is, and I wish boys wouldn't treat girls who are pursuing maybe less-traditionally feminine studies as less qualified for marriage.

...okay I think I'm done now thanks for listening to my rant on misogyny have a nice day.

No comments:

Post a Comment