This week we had a huge miracle which was that M CAME TO CHURCH!!!!!!! We have been fighting and working to get her to come and she never does because something always comes up or she´s sick or she has to take care of her mom or she has to go count votes for the government and if she doesn´t go she´ll be sent to prison for 3 months to a year... (true story, she showed us the letter and everything) but this week we prayed really hard and had a good solid lesson on the importance of keeping the sabbath day holy and especially we talked about the sacrament. It was so cool to see that as we just read the scriptures (3 Nephi 18) she really could feel the influence of the Spirit. The thing she´s always saying is that she understands everything (which she does, I´m pretty sure she understands the doctrine better than I do...) but she doesn´t feel it. And as we were reading, she just started to smile and said "Oh! I have to be at church, especially for the sacrament, to be able to have the Spirit with me!" and we also talked about planning ahead of time, like doing necessary cleaning/work on Saturday, going to bed early, setting out and preparing clothes to wear, etc. And it worked! She came! FINALLY!!
With Hna. O we had another lesson with her where we started out talking about the priesthood but then we ended up talking about how to feel the Spirit, because she was still saying that she didn´t feel the truth in her heart. I told her that I know she has felt the Spirit because in the 3+ months I´ve been teaching her, I´ve seen her change a lot, and I´ve seen her bear her burdens with more ánimo and grace. I reminded her of all the times we´ve come to see her and she´s been really happy and full of energy even though her life if difficult and she has a lot of challenges. I told her that THAT is the Spirit, that gives us energy and life and strength even when we are surrounded by problems. And it was amazing again! When we got there, she was a little tired and discouraged, but when we left, she had an extra skip in her step and she was beaming. I love teaching her because I can see the calming and fortifying influence of the Spirit so clearly as I serve her and help her understand the gospel.
I love being a missionary and I love the Spirit, who really is the teacher.
Fun fact for all you prospective missionaries:
Before you go on a mission, you see the missionaries and you think they know everything. You think they just glide through the streets finding people who are going to get baptized 2 days later. You think they must not ever get tired or nervous. You think they know exactly what they´re doing all the time.
hahaha LIES.
The more I´m out here, the more I realize that none of us really have any idea what we´re doing. The majority of the people we find don´t even give us their real number, much less agree to meet with us and MUCH less get baptized. We don´t know anywhere close to everything about the gospel, we don´t speak the language, we get lost, we get tired, we get nervous, and we make a ton of mistakes. Basically we just fake our confidence, and the Spirit makes up for the rest.
The thing I´ve learned is that being a missionary has nothing to do with ME. I only try to strengthen my testimony, love the people, and live worthy to have the Spirit with me. And it´s amazing that it works. And it works really well. Somehow people still love us and listen to us and get baptized, because they can feel that Spirit. No one can convince me that the success I´ve had on my mission has ANYTHING to do with me. This is the Lord´s work, and he permits us to do it with Him. And the biggest miracle is that our fake confidence becomes real, because we are worthy to represent the most incredible and perfect being who ever lived, even Jesus Christ. I love Him, I serve Him, and I do as He would do. I am so grateful for this privilege I have to represent Him.
Hermana Lara Schaumann
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